Another Joke

NASA was interviewing professionals they were thinking of sending to Mars.

The touchy part was that only one guy could go and it would be a one-way
trip, the guy not ever returning to Earth.

The interviewer asked the first applicant, an American engineer, how much he
wanted to be paid for going. "One million dollars," the engineer answered.
"And I want to donate it all to my alma mater--Rice University."

The next applicant was a Russian doctor, and the interviewer asked him the
same question. "Two millions dollars," the doctor said. "I want to give a
million to my family and leave the other million for the advancement of
medical research."

The last applicant was a Pakistani Politician. When asked how much money he
wanted, he whispered in the interviewer's ear, "Three million dollars." "Why
so much more than the others?" the interviewer asked. The Pakistani
Politician replied, "You give me three million, I'll give you one million,
I'll keep a million, and we'll send the American engineer."

Joke ... About Beers

There's a big conference of beer producers. At the end of the day, all of the presidents of all beer companies decide to have a drink in a bar.

The president of 'Budweiser' orders a Bud, the president of 'Miller' orders a Miller Lite, Adolph Coors orders a Coors, and the list goes on. Then the waitress asks Arthur Guinness what he wants to drink, and much to everybody's amazement, Mr. Guinness orders a Coke!

"Why don't you order a Guinness?" his colleagues ask.

"Naah. If you guys won't drink beer, than neither will I."

Sardar Ji Jokes

Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination which consists of Y/N type questions.

He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his wallet out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet - Y for Heads and N for Tails. Within half an hour he is all done whereas the rest of the class is sweating it out.

During the last few minutes, he is seen desperately throwing the coin, swearing and sweating.

The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on.

"Oye, I finished the exam in half and hour ". "But yaar ", he says, "I am rechecking my answers and am not able to tally them with what I wrote."
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A sardar ji used to go to college with his dog. After some days dog left the college but Sardar had to go still.

You know why???


...
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...
...


...
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Dog graduated but Sardar did not

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Banta: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says This is all India
Radio!
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Banta: Oye, tu to Doctor ke paas jaane waala tha, kya hua?
Santa: Yaar kal jaaonga, aaj thodi tabiyat kharab hai.
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sardar to preto
"eik wari i love u keh day"
preto: nahi menu sharam andi ey
sardar:ek wari keh de
preto: nahi
sardar: dekh le fer meri behan nahi?

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Interviewer: just imagine your in 3rd floor, it caught fire and how will you escape?

Sardar: its simple. I will stop my imagination! !!

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When sardar was traveling with his wife in an auto, the driver adjusted mirror.

Sardar shouted, "You are trying to see my wife? Sit back. I will drive."

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Manager asked to sardar at an interview Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?

Sardar replyed: -P-O-S-T-B-O- X.

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two sardars found two bombs
one said : oye chal yar police ko dey atey hain
2nd sardar : yar agra in main sey koi rastey main phat gaya to?
1st sardar : oye yar tu fikar na kar, keh den gey k aik he mila tha!!!!!

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Santa: Doctor saab, mein Chashma laga ke pad to sakoonga na?
Doctor: Haan, bilkul.
Santa: To phir theek hai doctor saab varna Anparh (illetrate) aadmi ki zindagi bhi koi
zindagi hai.

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Banta: Yeh chaaku (knife) kyon ubaal rahe ho?
Santa: Suicide karne ke liye
Banta: To phir ubalney ki kya zaroorat hai?
Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye
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In an interview,
Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. ....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup

FASTEST THING IN THE WORLD

Four guys, from Harvard, Yale, MIT and SIKH from Punjab University
were to be interviewed for a prestigious job. One common question
was asked to all 4 of them.

INTERVIEWER: WHICH IS THE FASTEST THING IN THE WORLD?

1. YALE guy: Its light, Nothing can travel faster than light.

2. HARVARD Guy: It's the Thought; b'cos thought is so fast it
comes instantly in your mind.
3. MIT guy: Its Blink, you can blink and its hard to realize you
blinked

4. SIKH : Its Loose motion
INTERVIEWER: (Shocked to hear Santa's reply, asked) "WHY"?
SIKH: Last night after dinner, I was lying in my bed and I got the
worst stomach cramps, and before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON
THE LIGHTS, it was over!!!!

Always good to have Friends.

Poetry .

wo jo SHeher Tha Ujar Gaya
Wo Jo Khuwab Tha Bikar Gaya

Kabhi Mausmon Ki Nazar Lagi
Kabhi Waahimo Nay Dara Diya

Kabhi Manziloon k Saraab Nay
Hamain Raasty Main Dagha Diya

Kabhi Zindagi Ki Kitaab Say
Hamain Jis Nay Chaha Mita Diya

Bas Isi Lie....

Wo Jo Ja Raha Tha To Door Tak
Usay Dekhty Hi Rahy Magar...

Nahi Di Sadda!!

Usy Rokty Bhi To Kis Liye...??