Monday, March 24, 2008

A rare occasion

March 21st 2008 was a rare day in the sense that the day was celebrated by most of the religions in one way or other. It was Eid-i-Milad- un-Nabi for msulims, Holi for Hindus, Good Friday (Easter) for Christians, Jashan-i-Nauroz (new year) for Parsi religoin, Brithday of Buddha for Budhists as well as day of Guru Panja (5th Guru of sikhs). As per historians this has probably happened for the first time in human history.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Only if you know how to make it done.

Son: "I will choose my own bride!"
Father: "But the girl is Bill Gate's daughter."
Son: "Well, in that case...ok"




Next Father approaches Bill Gates.

Father: "I have a husband for your daughter."
Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to marry!"
Father: "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank."
Bill Gates: "Ah, in that case...ok"






Finally Father goes to see the president of the World Bank.

Father: "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president. "
President: "But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!"
Father: "But this young man is Bill Gate's son-in-law."
President: "Ah, in that case...ok"


Moral : Even If you have nothing, You can get Anything ,

If your attitude is positive.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Its Fun Time

Q. How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?

A. Concrete floors are very hard to crack!


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Q. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it?

A. No time at all it is already built.


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Q. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?

A. Very large hands. (Good one)


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Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?

A. It is not a problem, since you will never find! an elephant with one hand.


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Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep?

A. No Probs , He sleeps at night.


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Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?

A. It will Wet or Sink as simple as that.


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Q. What looks like half apple ?

A : The other half.


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Q. What can you never eat for breakfast ?

A : Lunch and Dinner.


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Q. What happened when wheel was invented ?

A : It caused a revolution.


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Q. Bay of Bengal is in which state?

A : Liquid


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ONE EXTRA SHOT


Interviewer said "I shall either ask you ten easy questions or one really difficult question.


Think well before you make up your mind!" The boy thought for a while and said, "my choice is one really difficult question."


"Well, good luck to you, you have made your own choice! Now tell me this.


"What comes first, Day or Night?"


The boy was jolted into reality as his admission depends on the correctness of his answer, but he thought for a while and said, "It's the DAY sir!"


"How" the interviewer asked,


"Sorry Sir, you promised me that you will not ask me a SECOND difficult question!"

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Pakistani Motor Rickshaw.

It is now time to do an in-depth analysis of the Pakistani motor rickshaw.



The motor- (sometimes auto-) rickshaw was invented by the Reverend Jonathan Scobie, an American Baptist minister living in Yokohama, Japan. The first model was built in 1869 in order to transport his handicapped wife. Today it remains as one of the most important modes of transportation in Pakistan where it was first seen on August 14, 1947. Before that it was not possible to see it in Pakistan.



The three-wheel-design of a rickshaw provides it a better road grip than a bicycle. It also provides gasoline savings when compared with a 4-wheeler taxi and green salad saving when compared with a 4-legged horse. When in need of repairs, the three-wheel structure also helps in lifting it from any side. When a side is lifted, it conveniently sits down on the other two while a mechanic goes looking for underbelly mechanical faults.

Pilot seat. A rickshaw is a perfect example of a compact automobile design. The driver practically sits on a bench seat which is strategically placed on top of the engine. This causes inductive heat transfer between man and machine and keeps the engine cool. The same however, cannot be said for the driver’s butt. The presence of a hot engine underneath, keeps a driver cozy during winters and boiling during summers. It is literally one heck of a hot seat to sit on. The advantage of a bench seat is manifold. A driver uses it to his own advantage to slide from one corner to the other depending on whichever side gives him a better view.



Driver’s Ergonomics. A rickshaw is immaculately designed to keep a driver relaxed during long hours. This has been accomplished by limiting the driving controls to both hands and a leg only. This keeps one leg of the driver free which he can dangle around when tired. Many of us must have seen the common practice where a tired driver lifts one of his legs and conveniently places it on top of the dash-board while still driving the rickshaw.



Starting Mechanism. The height of automotive engineering is the design of rod (danda) start mechanism of the rickshaw engine. A 3 feet long lever is put on the floor of the rickshaw. To start the engine, a driver bends down to the side and lifts one end of this ‘danda’ in a quick swift motion. Look at the photo to the right. If everything else is right then the engine starts. Otherwise the whole exercise of ‘danda’ lifting is repeated as many times as needed.

Passengers Foot-hold. While a rickshaw floor’s mean height above sea level is less than 2 feet, a one-step foot hold is nonetheless provided on the passenger side of the cabin. I’ve never seen anyone using it but it is a detail important enough not to be missed out in this analysis. Most of the passengers bypass this one-step climbing assistance and put their first step directly inside the passenger cabin.

This foot-hold step is visible in the photo to the right above.

Head lamp. Rickshaw comes with a single headlamp. The light emanating from this headlamp is usually just enough that other people can see that something is on-coming but a rickshaw driver doesn’t see anything. Its luminescence makes one constantly reminded of Elton John’s song ‘candle in the wind’



Laws of Reflection. A rickshaw driver usually adorns his rickshaw with a multiple array of reflective mirrors. If a ray of light enters a rickshaw once, it gets trapped and it takes a while for it to get out after being internally reflected many times. These mirrors are placed by the driver to his own strategic advantage. If a passenger is to his liking then these mirrors help the driver to keep an eye on the passenger from many different angles.
Small is Big. I have never seen a group of people denied a rickshaw ride just because of their numbers. It can fit them all including luggage. Many times one can see a family chilling out in the passenger cabin while their younger ones sharing driver’s cabin with the driver. If a rickshaw picks up passengers from a railway station, luggage is easily placed in driver’s cabin.




Flat Tire Replacement. In case of a flat tire adversity, a rickshaw comes fully equipped with a mechanical jack. This jack is in the shape of a rectangular sheet-metal of roughly 12″x 24″ dimension. The simplicity of design here beats all modern hydraulic and geared jack designs. A rickshaw driver simply tilts his rickshaw on a side, inserts this sheet metal plate for support and changes the tire. The whole process of tilting a rickshaw and inserting the jack takes less than 10 seconds.

The Rickshaw Driver Culture. Over the years certain etiquettes have evolved among rickshaw drivers. A passenger cannot just walk into an empty rickshaw and sit. He/She has to take driver’s permission first. The magic question to ask is “Is rickshaw empty?” (rickshaw khali hai?). This question must be asked even if a rickshaw is visibly empty because depending on his mood a driver at anytime may declare a visibly empty rickshaw as occupied. Then there is no question of arguing. Rickshaw drivers have also mastered the sign language. If a rickshaw is empty then instead of saying ‘yes’ a driver usually moves his neck towards the passenger cabin in a long swooshing motion. This means rickshaw is empty. Please get in.





Mirror of Society. Rickshaws are also a mirror of our society. Rickshaw drivers use back of the rickshaw as their scrap book. It displays their favorite poetry, puzzling questions, messages to other drivers, etc. I don’t remember seeing any rickshaw ever without anything written on its back side. Some of these comments are a running commentary on our society’s social and economic fabric. Take a look at 5 sample rickshaw messages:
malik ki gaaRi, driver ka paseena
chalti hai road par bun ka haseena
kabhi aao na Karachi, khashbo laga ke
Daalar ki talaash

Monday, March 03, 2008

WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:

Men Are Just Happier People -- What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal.

You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental $100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. !

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

No wonder men are happier.

Send this to the women who can handle it

and to the men who will enjoy reading it =)